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Entered By: Mark
Entry Date: 2013-06-27 12:22:18
Subject: Old Age Turns Tables

For you "old guys", think back to your newlywed days. OK, last week I realized that "old guy" means 40+, in a casual conversation with a "college kid". Anyway, back to the story. When we were first married, our wives put us on the spot. We'd see them after a few hours absence to be asked "notice anything different about me?"

For you younger guys, here are some poor responses:

"You showered."

"You shaved your facial hair."

"You stopped complaining about your in-laws."

"You've put on weight."

To be honest, if you don't know the right answer, there is no 100% guaranteed backup answer. You could try "you're more beautiful than ever", but that still reveals that you don't notice enough about her. Even if you do know the right answer (sometimes "you got a haircut"), it's a good idea to put on an expression of joy and excitement no matter what you think of the new do. This question actually only gets asked a few times before wives give up; so when you bomb on it, take solace in the fact that she lowers her expectations of you until the question is no longer asked.

Well, I've waited 22 years for this, but I finally turned the tables. A couple nights ago Paula and I went out with Mike and Martha Rudd, to our favorite restaurant. While waiting for the Rudds, I asked Paula "notice anything different about me?" She gave it her best, even tried the haircut response but prefaced it with "you got your haircut last week". I truly had her stumped. Satisfied that I finally had her, I replied:

"I shaved 5 mm off my eyebrows."

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