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Entered By: Paula
Entry Date: 2014-10-20 22:44:04
Subject: God is always in control

Why do I ever forget, doubt, or not stand in complete awe of how in control God is?  He looks after our hearts constantly, and gives compassion always.  He is God, I am not.  I am thankful.  

These past few weeks I have been in hiding of sorts, in our neighborhood anyway.  Rumors traveling our dirt roads, Arnold getting beat up by a local man, a worker that was let go who is angry and desperate taking us to the labor board, a student that we had darting to not look me in the face, a 20 year old calling us irresponsible parents............these things have hurt.  I have wanted the gate locked, and I have kept my eyes on the road with the windows rolled up when I drive out of the gate.  This is not the norm. 

Today I gritted my teeth as I went out early to tutoring.  Glenda was bringing the kids from the school, so I didn't need to walk to get them.  As I entered the community center I felt overwhelmed with the need to pray, to seek His face for each child that would enter, to pray for grace.  I felt overwhelming peace, a knowing that He was in control and that it is, was, and will always be all about Him, and nothing about me.  Oh what a blessed revelation.  

We were all prepared, the kids came, and I didn't  know them.  I mean, I knew their faces and some of their names, but they weren't our kids, not our regulars.  Then a few we have tutored since February trickled in with their smiles and hugs.  I saw Faith's look of concern;  how would we handle and evaluate this many new kids at one time, 8 new ones in all.  The boys rallied, Faith and Glenda were stellar as always and we dove in.  

Oh these precious new children we were given today.  One precious little boy had little bugs fall out of his hair as we were doing letters and sounds.  He was so happy to be given attention.  He loved receiving a high five for a job well done.  He stole my heart.  Minutes before I was talking myself out of pouting because some of our regulars that I adore were not there.  The head teacher had explained to Glenda that several had been doing so well and advancing so much that they wanted to give some different kids a chance.  At the beginning of the year we gave the teachers the freedom to send whom they felt needed it the most.  We have just had for the most part the same kids with little variance.  But.  God is in control and cares for His children.  

The teacher also shared with Glenda that the new children she was going to send were struggling with terrible home problems and needed special care.  One child has had a parent murdered recently.  

And I had been hiding.  

Oh how faithful He is.  The other stuff hurts, Thursday is looming, but He is faithful and He cares.  




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Advent, Part 1  by Paula on Monday December 03, 2018
Tuesday September 04, 2018  by Paula on Tuesday September 04, 2018
Wednesday February 21, 2018  by Paula on Wednesday February 21, 2018
Monday February 19, 2018  by Paula on Monday February 19, 2018
Sunday February 18, 2018/Confession  by Paula on Sunday February 18, 2018
Thursday January 25, 2018  by Paula on Thursday January 25, 2018
Lenten season  by Paula on Saturday March 04, 2017
re: Justice  by Paula on Saturday March 04, 2017
A smidge of realization  by Paula on Saturday January 21, 2017
re: Tuesday January 17, 2017  by Paula on Thursday January 19, 2017

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